We’re all products of our environments…

I’m a doer. Being able to do a lot of things at once, and do it quickly used to be a gift I took for granted.

I matured quickly - worked at the age of 12. I learned quickly - and was often disruptive in class.

I processed quickly with a memory of steel - and became a useful tool for employers, teachers, and finding my parents keys.

I’m an 80’s baby - My mom and step dad were white middle class “blue collar” folks, we lived in Dartmouth and they did their best for my brother and I, putting in long work days. I saw my dad and non-bio dad, who were white middle class country folks in the Annapolis Valley, on weekends, holidays and summer breaks. They raised my African Nova Scotian brother and sister, from a previous marriage, in a tiny rural community - we were a normal, happy family.  

It wasn’t until I was an adult that I realized what I had been oblivious to, the pain that was inflicted by our social systems on people like my dads, the LGBTQ2SAI++ and Queer communities, visual minorities like my siblings.

It wasn’t until I outgrew every job I ever had because I did too much, that I realized my gift was in a way a curse. That I couldn’t be (nor should I want to be) ordinary at work. That my gift had a name, neurodiversity, and that by understanding it I could offer much more to the world and be much more compassionate to myself.

It wasn’t until I had children with “special needs” that I realized that there was nothing special about their need to be treated equally - to be met where they were.

It wasn’t until my child faced addiction and trauma and homelessness that I saw the life-threatening gaps in our systems that for such a long time, worked for me. They worked for me, because they were built for people like me - white, cisgender, heterosexual settlers.

Sure, as a woman I have faced barriers, and still do. I don’t get jobs against men with the same qualifications; I have to advocate for my rights as a parent; I have to fight for the right to make decisions about my body; I’ve faced deep financial hardships at times when I was a single parent, and I have trauma from my past. But, I recognize privilege has brought me here today.

Writing this blog on my computer - privilege.

Feeling the warmth from my fluffy socks and the heat pumping below my feet - privilege.

Knowing that my children, although most of them are not home, are safe to be roaming around with their friends in town or driving around carelessly listening to music - privilege.

I do not take for granted my privilege although I had been ignorant to it for a LONG, long time. I do not take for granted my gifts that my neurodiverse brain has given me, nor do I take for granted the gift of healing from my traumas.

I do let these things fuel me.

A great friend of mine told me recently that my diverse life with diverse struggles has driven me to dedicate my life to helping others to overcome barriers, and that I do it with “tenacity”.

I am tenacious.

W. Clement Stone said, “You are the product of your environment. So choose the environment that will best develop you toward your objective.” My objective is to create a world, together, where equity replaces privilege. Where a sense of belonging replaces exclusion, and where hope replaces fear.

Together we can build a resilient community.